I seldom write about my husband. If I do, it is a one-sided banter. This year on our 15th social wedding anniversary, I won’t proclaim that he is the love of my life or the greatest thing that happened to me or that our relationship is magical or that we have amazing chemistry. Because all that would be a lie.
Despite being eloquent, I can never put in words what he is to me today and what our relationship has come to be. If you asked me 10 years ago I wouldn’t have been able to tell you the relevance of our marriage. Together, we continue to learn many life lessons. And together somehow we overcome many hurdles.
This year has been the most trying for both of us. Even though I consider myself the strongest of us, I’ve been most emotional, vulnerable and struggled to get a grip on life. During such times, even without formal training he stepped in to be my grief coach and instilled logic that pissed me off at that moment but made sense after some thought. I have not been able to do the same for him.
Every day we both make unprepared compromises, put up with each other’s idiocies, different ideologies, eccentric work styles, mostly mine, raising my parent, polar opposite creative interests, my compulsive need to clean at odd times, even sometimes telling him what he should or shouldn’t eat, drink, the list goes on.
But in over a decade and half of being together, Ram quietly provided his assurances when I was disgruntled, showing that respect for each other is more than butterflies in the stomach, consistently showing that what happens at home is much more worth than outside perception, that he is proud of me without even saying, and that we don’t have to be a perfect couple to have found our quotidian blessing.
Rummy is a game of skill or mere skill. True to this year’s International Women’s Day theme, #BreaktheBias, a social stigma that had piled up in many hearts and minds was shattered with an overwhelming participation, some wins were close to our heart but ultimate goal was to have good fun. Congrats to Sudha and Anila for securing first and second places respectively in the Rummy tournament.
Thanks to some timely, organizational skills and sleek event management by Sheethal (ATA Convention Women’s Sports Chair), Prashanthi Muthyala (Co-chair), Swetha, Sravanthi, Karuna, Priya, Anu, Rekha, Sunitha, Radhika, the event was a visual treat. Many thanks to Sanju for the endless supply of resources and refreshments for the event, CATS teams, Sudheer Bandaru and Deepika Boojala for leadership support and big shout out to all the ladies, their families that came to make it another spectacular extravaganza.
#quotidianblessing American Telugu Association-ATA
Even when we’ve memories of a lifetime There will be moments when we miss you To come to terms you’re gone forever Won’t make it better for any of us But knowing that you’re immortal Is the strength we muster to move on That you’ll perhaps watch over us Especially when we most need
Your absence is going to hurt so much Regardless of the times we’ve spent No one could ever fill your big shoes However hard anyone could ever try A piece of our heart burned with you Leaving us empty and aching If only we all had a little more time We’d hold on and never let you go
Thank you for all the knowledge And the pursuit of excellence you chose Teaching so many valuable lessons About life, love and personal relations Despite transcending to another world You brought us together this time too There shall never be another like you Rest in heaven, until we see you again!
I never felt this complete before. There are so many indequacies I’ve overcome this year although it’s not even three months since new year. It took me to overcome intrinsic, personal, unconscious biases that I harbored and the boundaries in my mind.
My struggle with infertility and the state of mind it often leads to propelled me to come to a conclusion that I am meant for many not just to parent one or two. And, to pick myself up to lead the way for topics of taboo was not easy, but here I am.
I felt like a fish out of water around traditional establishments. But with a little nudge and a leap of faith from community leaders, I have begun to explore glass cliffs with women who have limitations just like me. After delivering a successful American Telugu Association International Women’s Day event, I won’t be looking back anymore.
I am fighting my ‘Congnitive Dissonance’, wherein upon hearing my own voice in a recording, I experience huge distress. So I started to rely on constructive criticism which I was uncomfortable with for a long time. Feedback is indeed a gift!
My passion for work was transmitting as anxiety without me realizing the detriment it was causing to those around me. With little help, I am able to curtail that tension and bring a sense of calm in crises. I didn’t know my power of modulation until I exercised it.
Negative perception about me used to bother me a lot. And I spent a lot of time and energy retorting or trying to revamp my image. I realized that no matter what I cannot dissuade cynics. Now, I’ve conditioned myself to just become stronger with each gossip.
“Start by doing what’s necessary; then do what’s possible; and suddenly you’re doing the impossible.” And my goal is not to be a real life hero or be perfect but to be purposeful. To feel complete and help others to be.
I made a lot of mistakes in my life, both professional and personal. But to be able to be vulnerable in front of those in whose shoes I was 20 years ago was the most riveting experience. Many may choose to call it ‘paying it forward’. Yet, I was the one who made the best of it. While sharing my own, I revisited so many memories and blunders alike that made me who I am today. I wouldn’t be this version of me if those didn’t happen.
Thanks to Sachidanand Angadi Sir, my lecturer at Y.B.Chavan College of Pharmacy, who is now the Principal of Yash Institute of Pharmacy, to have thought about me to be amidst his amazing students to share my sentiments about gender equity, my life journey, why I had to give up pharmacy to take my current path, life altering situations, and a little career guidance for those who wanted a perspective.
It was a rare happiness that I couldn’t express in words hearing the voice of my classmate Dr. Gajanan Vaishnav and be able to witness a monumental change of female to male student ratio. During my time we were about 1:6 but it is a 50/50 now. Thanks to Suwarna and Swamini ma’am’s support that I was able to seamlessly enjoy the virtual one hour. This wouldn’t have been possible if the pandemic didn’t let us explore options to bring the world together in some form.
“At times, our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.” And I had the opportunity to be rekindled by 100+ of them. I am blessed indeed.
Let me be When I want to play in my mother’s womb Let me be When I want to feel visible Let me be When I wear blue and black Let me be When I don’t want to braid my hair Let me be When I want to be a tomboy Let me be When I want to be different Let me be When I feel various emotions Let me be When I hit puberty Let me be When I don’t want to marry Let me be When love is love for me Let me be When I want to travel the world Let me be When I want to wear shorts Let me be When I don’t confirm Let me be When I wish to pamper myself Let me be When I am defensive and loud Let me be When I am calm and compassionate Let me be When I am an extrovert Let me be When I don’t want to talk Let me be When I don’t want to get hurt Let me be When I don’t want to banter Let me be When I want to rule the place Let me be When you don’t agree Let me be When I don’t fit an honor Let me be When I walk away Let me be When I want to ink my arms Let me be When I want to be a boss Let me be When I want to rise Let me be Let me be
“Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire, you will what you imagine and at last you create what you will,” said George Bernard Shaw.
When I was a 5th grader I declared in front of the whole class, my class teacher, and my 4th grade English teacher about my father being a traveler alongside Gulliver (from Gulliver’s travels) and that he brought home few ‘Lilliputs’.
My class teacher, a strict nun, could’ve easily reprimanded me for ‘lying’. Instead she let my imagination go wild, motivated me to build that story, and I ended up creating little stories of my own about my father’s travels as a sailer. My father was an Academician! Because of her, a story teller was born that day.
And it is because of such amazing teachers, mentors and coaches who don’t judge, let you fail and rise, allow you to learn from mistakes, do weird things with you, and channel possibilities, people like me blossom into who we are meant to be – whether be an innovator, inventor, writer, poet, researcher, technologist, leader, doctor, business (wo)man, politician, or another teacher, mentor and coach.
WIT is in need of mentors that can help turn aspirations into tangible career paths, develop and nurture ideas, transform intent into implementation, and harness the inner potential in their proteges. Mentors are a must in everyone’s life, not just for the hyperimaginative child (like I once was) but for adults who need help navigating their professional stability and progress.
There were times Where my tears were terrifying The thoughts of losing love Felt worse than death Not that it was exaggerated But heart had it reasons Fear superceded all hope Until I realized it’s matter of time
When doors close on me I am not afraid to look For that window of better life Piece of that heaven on earth Even though it is never perfect To push myself to give my best Despite knowing I might fall Because getting up matters
When inner demons try hard I am not afraid to try Mustering all the positivity And shut down those roads That lead to nowhere While making my own path Creating those tiny miracles Each and every single day
When there are cries for help I am not afraid to give Even thought I might have little It makes a difference to help Giving, then becomes a virtue Like an old habit that’s engrained Nothing is more gratifying Knowing I’ve made an impact