Alligator in the Room

Years ago, I was coached for being an “Alligator in the room.” It wasn’t tangible feedback and I assumed that it was one of those gender blinds. So I ignored and continued to work on those that made sense.

Most women, who are assertive, are often tagged as being aggressive. Nothing wrong with that until the perception is translated to being arrogant and intimidating.

Some others that I talk to have said that they overlook and have developed thick skin to combat such comments guised as feedback. Nevertheless, each of us have learned to lean towards success in our own way.

There is no right or wrong way to tackle these situations because it is ultimately a personal preference on what we choose to fight for. But I wish more of us are able to challenge the status quo.

For those who’ve not been in these situations, it is hard to comprehend. And just because it hasn’t happened to you doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen.

I am reminded of a quote from Twitter by Jayne, “To the women who are aggressive: keep being assertive. To the women who are bossy: keep on leading To the women who are difficult: keep telling the truth. To the women who are too much: keep taking up space To the women who are awkward: keep asking hard questions.”

We don’t need a yearly commemoration to remind us that we can empower ourselves to challenge the status quo. Because, “I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” Maya Angelou

(Many have asked me to ‘move on’ from writing about DEI, women centric topics and get ‘competitive’ and focus on technical stuff. I promise, when I feel the time is right.)

#leadership #psychologicalsafety #work #motivation

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