Covidite – The COVID Erudite

Note: This has been written with certain sarcasm that is neither meant to be derogatory nor undermining the gravity of the situation. Rest is reader’s imagination.

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For ages, we conveniently spent generations spreading awareness and planning for the unknown that we forgot to live. When it was time to create relevance we had no clue what or how to do and in many situations we didn’t know why we are doing it in the first place. Even I have been living an illogical, idiotic life and thought I’d still sound sensible writing this piece of whatever the reader makes of it. Merci Beaucoup for reading through your story and mine.

We had built an entire lifestyle of flamboyance, socializing, even sympathizing worldly affairs. Few of us even indulged in philanthropy and charity. COVID19 came. Suddenly, all that was invaluable a day ago became obsolete. Socializing became social distancing where we started creating huge gaping spaces with the very same people that we probably grinded against in an air tight dance club a few days ago. We refuse to have a molecule of their air contaminate ours when in the past, we’d sniff each other like little chihuahuas. (Oh! That so reminded me of Paris Hilton and her Tinkerbell.)

And out of nowhere, swagger became safety of the family and self. It is funny when my husband sneezes, I quickly sneak away into an unknown corner of our home wondering if I should say, “bless you” or “heck with you”. Well, the switch between both didn’t take much long. It was as quick as the love that flew out the window after the honeymoon period was over. Better yet, I have thoughts of which room of least impact should I quarantine him if I have to. I, ofcourse, can do not wrong as I’ve shunned other human contact till my BFFs made me stand 6-feet apart having a chirpy conversation which couldn’t have happened on the phone.

I was reading somewhere that there is a shortage of certain contraptions. Everyone in their right state of mind should or would be worried about ‘Coronials’ that is babies born 9 months after the Coronavirus quarantine especially when people around the world are fighting for life and gasping for breath. All those frivolous minds perhaps wouldn’t have anything better to do besides conjugating. Whether it is test of times or a boom of babies, we’ll sure be witness.

For those who would have wasted tons of food in luxurious times, have now taken a higher responsibility. They don’t mind waiting outside a grocery store in anticipation of being the 10th person to be let in only to pick up essentials and not the extra things that they never needed, and that they would have otherwise picked up. The milk-rich desi ghee sweets became history and now we crave to eat healthy – If my starting to eat broccoli is any testament. Just like that, there is no waste.

Friends who haven’t seen or talked in decades magically are coming together to have those everlasting memories on tiny squares where the pixels of the face have been distorted. Yet, there is a certain awe in all doing all that we could have done when when times were apt but chose to wait until the signal of doom dawned on us. And, in a flood of remembrances, the forgotten ones have come back to into our lives.

What irony it is. The good mornings, good afternoons and the memes have turned informational. Although mindless in their own accord have captivated people of all ages to be glued to what could be the next forward. On idiot boxes and miniatures, statistics became in-vogue again. There is a great sense of urgency to flatten the curve except that we have no clue how to. Better yet, we’ve even started yelling at our own to stay the f- home.

Somewhere else in the world, when folks are asked to express solidarity, the aplomb turned into stupidy and the entire purpose of this herculean shelter-in-place became volatile. Yet, there is nothing anyone can do besides begging, pleading, educating, incentivizing or having popular figures sing, scream and dance to convey a certain message that shouldn’t have been so hard to begin with. After all, who’d want to die from virus that has not cure.

Out of nowhere, compassion is overflowing for the less privileged and those that have been involved in community service or supposedly started taking a lead to serve for the better good of humanity. Makes me wonder, where were they prior to this situation. We had the poor, needy and hungry even then. Why now? Perhaps an opportunity or a sense of duty – one would never know. Looks like, Coronavirus nudged a lot of us to reality making us debonair covidites (covid+erudite).

We have finally become the humans worthy of this beautiful earth. A bunch that cares for nature, for each other, some putting this time to good use, or beginning to respect the coworker they’d ignored, and that vast majority who simply believe that being a couch-potato is the best of their support they could offer. Nevertheless, it is so worth going back to basics, filial affections, even the laziness that was shunned before and collectively making sure that the covidiosyncrasies prevail for the amelioration of this planet, now and forever. And, we shall go down in history of being the proud covidites who won the war against many covidiots and this deadly pandemic.

Picture Courtesy: fda.gov

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